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The Suicide Candidate

August 12, 2016 | FlaglerLive | 51 Comments

donald trum suicide candidate
Seriously? (Evan Guest)

“Some have such command of their bowels,” St. Augustine writes in “The City of God,”  “that they can break wind continuously at pleasure, so as to produce the effect of singing.” We have such a commander in fife in Donald Trump. The effect of course is not of singing. And a lot more than wind is breaking.

pierre tristam column flaglerlive.com flaglerlive It’s become almost impossible to go a day without hearing Trump make one outrageous declaration or another. I find myself clicking on news sites every few hours just to see what imbecility he’s come up with last, and with what perverted ingenuity he manages to self-destruct, as if there were much left to destroy. It’s like a cross between Kurt Vonnegut’s Dresden in “Slaughterhouse Five” and Bill Murray’s “Groundhog Day.” The firebombing starts over every time Trump speaks.

If he’s not insulting members of his own party, making treasonous suggestions to Russia or adding bricks to the masonry of his racism, he’s denigrating the parents of a decorated soldier killed at war or signaling to “Second Amendment people” that assassinating Hillary Clinton or judges she appoints to the bench  might be an option after all. “And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how Israeli Prime Minister Yitzhak Rabin got assassinated,” The New York Times’s Thomas Friedman wrote on Aug. 9, in a column that also called Trump “a disgusting human being” for playing with fire as if it has no consequences.


Friedman was being too polite, considering what Trump belched next. Just between the third and fourth draft of this piece he came up with a new one: President Obama didn’t only facilitate the rise of ISIL by withdrawing from Iraq (itself the asinine cover for George W. Bush’s lost war) but he was ISIL’s founder, its “most valuable player.” For Trump, it’s a crudely coded way to revive his old racist birther taunts and Obama’s Muslimness. (You can’t get more precise with Trump, who really wouldn’t know a Muslim from a Presbyterian.) Disgusting? Unquestionably. But not nearly as disgusting as his apologists, some of whom are your best friends, judging from Flagler County’s collaborative infatuation with the most virulent hater and unabashed liar in the history of candidacies to the the presidency.

If Trump is flagged for the outrage he calls it sarcasm, blames the media, adds it to his self-fulfilling prophesies about a rigged election. Or he sheds another one of his crocodile tweets. He’s the victim, you see. The guy who can fix all our problems on his own, the infallible businessman, the untouchable superstar of what he calls, like Prometheus from earth’s bowels, “a movement,” this guy claims to be the victim. “It’s not fair,” that anthem of middle school angst, is the Trump mantra.

He’s desperate to be taken seriously. We keep hearing his campaign handlers promise that if we only give him a chance and hear him on the issues, he’d clobber Clinton. She’s eminently clobberable, but not nearly as much as her vigilante detractors make her out to be. Compared to the flaws of a Lyndon Johnson, a Richard Nixon or a Ronald Reagan—by far the most crooked and indicted administration of the last century, which says something about modern Republicans’ affinities for the Gipper—Clinton comes out looking more noble than Lady Bird.

Pierre's Recent Columns:


  • The Baalbek Ruins, Israeli Edition
  • Why Palm Coast’s Debt Referendum Failed
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  • Speech Codes at Flagler School Board and Palm Coast Council Are Now Illegal
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  • Florida’s Sunshine Law Is Dying
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Anyway Trump had that chance this week in Detroit when he delivered a speech on the economy. But it was as if he’d asked Melania Trump to put her skills to work and plagiarize a bit of Paul Ryan on taxes (cut them all), a bit of Bernie Sanders on trade (tear up those treaties), and a lot of standard GOP theology on Obamacare (send it to hell). It was a string of bumper stickers without a plan for accountants to add up, though his tax cuts alone would, as Politico put it, make the deficit great again. So just like a few candidates for local office who make things up as they go along, thinking no one will check after them, he could say whatever he wanted without having to be held accountable to any bottom line. But he’s not running for mosquito control. It’s hard to take seriously.

He’s not any different on foreign policy, where he’s managed to sound like even more of a blithering idiot than Sarah Palin. At least Palin’s imagination stopped at what she saw from her house. Trump keeps confusing Scotland with England, Russia with Ukraine, Sunnis and Shiites and nuclear weapons with baseball bats, all the while finding ways to praise not just one dictator but five, including North Korea’s, Syria’s and Saddam Hussein. Forget his small hands. He has fascism envy. No wonder even Palin ditched him: it says something when a former McCain policy adviser says she’d have trusted Palin more than Trump with national security—or that 50 national security experts–Republicans, Democrats, Independents—are calling Trump dangerous. They must smell the daisy.

When you look past the brute, behind the knave and beneath the hair, there’s no there there: no policies, no plans, no grand vision. Just appeals to base instincts and violent impulses by a totalitarian wannabe. He’ll never win the presidency. It’s become clear that he knows it and doesn’t want it. Nothing else explains his reckless abandon and his compulsion to pack his bulk with more explosives the moment he appears to edge ahead of Clinton. But that makes him more dangerous, not less. He’s a fanatic. He’s a suicide candidate. And we still have three months of rampage.

Pierre Tristam is FlaglerLive’s editor. Reach him by email here or follow him @PierreTristam. A version of this piece aired on WNZF.

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Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. PCer says

    August 12, 2016 at 6:41 pm

    I cannot figure out why people like him. I can understand not liking Hillary, but why Trump? Are his followers really that easily swayed by rhetoric? There is no substance to anything he says or does. Some say he is a good businessman, but in reality he is a crooked businessman who got rich by ripping off the little guy. Are people blind to that?

  2. A Little Common Sense Please says

    August 12, 2016 at 6:55 pm

    We are in deep Doo Doo either way we go. This is the sorriest group of candidates for national office I’ve seen in my lifetime.

  3. R Sandy Ausbrooks says

    August 12, 2016 at 7:19 pm

    Please Pierre, don’t hurl the word “liar” at a Republican lest you live in a glass house that can withstand the ravages of self-inflicted storms. Not that they don’t all have the propensity, but on the stage Hillary was on, and the lies told there, gimme a break!

  4. Anonymous says

    August 12, 2016 at 7:20 pm

    Trump knows what is going on and who is to blame. Little by little more keeps coming out about how corrupt office holders really are. He may not be very tactful when he says what he does, but he doesn’t lie like his opponent. We have been having the wool pulled over our eyes for far too long. It is a breath of fresh air to have a candidate who is not polished tell it like it is. This country didn’t get in the shape it is in by the same olds doing differently. Electing Hillary would be a repeat of four years of the Obama administration. The only hope we have is to elect Trump. It’s obvious he does something right, he is rich and all of his children are to be proud of. Driving through this state, the TRUMP signs are plenty and standing proud!

  5. tulip says

    August 12, 2016 at 7:34 pm

    I am convinced that Trump really doesn’t want to be President and that he played the game to see how far he could get. No candidate in their right mind would deliberately say the things he does if he wanted to win.If indeed he really is playing a game with the American voters and hurting the other candidates who are running for various offices, then he deserves every rotten thing he gets called and deserves to be run out of town on a rail.

    Hillary has medical problems due to her blood clot, faints, has had seizures right on tv, etc. She has a brain problem which will forever give her problems, as does so many people who have had medical brain issues. But it’s more scary because it affects her ability to be a good president because of confusion and lack of good judgement and also we cant believe her lies..

    Trump has some kind of brain development issue, don’t know what to call it. He can’t control what he says, and acts like a bully child and blatantly lies. Neither gets my vote.

  6. Just a thought says

    August 12, 2016 at 8:07 pm

    I’m in my 50s and my presidential election memory only goes back to Reagan. And while I’m a democrat, I vote my heart not my party. In my memory not even Ross Perot brought as much comidic relief as Trump. ( if trump wasn’t so scary). Clinton is not a great choice but heads above that buffoon. I was hoping the republicans put up someone a bit more moderate so Clinton was the only real choice. But that’s politics.

  7. Donald Trump's Tiny Fingers says

    August 12, 2016 at 8:09 pm

    I love trump, not because of his tiny hands or his cheeto colored complexion. I love him because he’s managed to almost completely destroy the GOP. Between him and the leaked emails that caused DWS to resign I’m a happy camper – our political system is in turmoil, he’s not going to win the election, and in another 4 years maybe we’ll see some quality third party candidates.

  8. Ben Ghazi says

    August 12, 2016 at 8:35 pm

    Gee, does the editor of this on-line liberal web site actually believe Hillary Rodham Clinton is going to save America. Or does he just wish America gets destroyed in the process ?

  9. Davet says

    August 12, 2016 at 8:47 pm

    It appears to me Trump thinks this is some darn game and it also appears to me he got into this to wipe out the establishment within the GOP and get Hillary elected. . He has done both of those things.

  10. Jim Bob says

    August 12, 2016 at 9:07 pm

    Hopefully, out of the debacle of this election multiple parties wills emerge which will necessitate compromise and coalition. Right now, we’re all voting for assholes and Pierre didn’t nominate any of them.

  11. BlueJammer says

    August 12, 2016 at 9:46 pm

    Well written article, Pierre. Personally, I love both of the candidates because they, Trump and Hillary, have clearly displayed what we Americans detest the most in our politicians, lies and stupidity. And, my dear friends, these two standards combined with a fanatical passion for power are what governs our beloved country.

    When will this mess end? I suppose when we the people say so. But not with these two candidates.

  12. anonymous says

    August 12, 2016 at 10:21 pm

    Pierre Tristan’s reviews always make me sick they are so slanted. You need to get someone else to write commentaries. His opinions are very slanted. I suppose he is for the regime and corruption that are ruling and want to continue with Hillary. She’s way corrupt and that is clear. Trump is not perfect as we are all not. He is miles above Killary, her corruption, deception and lies. Give us a break Pierre and RETIRE why don’t you?

  13. Geezer says

    August 12, 2016 at 10:33 pm

    Let’s cancel Election Day 2016, and be single for a few years.

  14. r&r says

    August 13, 2016 at 4:28 am

    He’s alone with no support from the republican establishment. The only other choice is a fugitive from prison who lies, cheats, abets to murder and has NO loyalty to this country which Obama has destroyed.

  15. Brian says

    August 13, 2016 at 4:40 am

    I never thought I would live to say this, but I somewhat agree with Pierre. I support Trump, and I am voting for him. Pretty much everything Trump says is true, but so often he just doesn’t know HOW to say it. But people who are really concerned about the direction of the country can overlook the bombast when considering the option to Trump – the corrupt, incompetent, lying pant-suited weasel. People are in prison for committing a fraction of the offenses she is indisputably proven to be guilty of. Obama wants Clinton – doesn’t that tell you anything? The current Bum-In-Chief is also a lying incompetent. He achieved the presidency as a result of his silver tongue – what had he accomplished in his prior life? He doesn’t care about jobs: he’s never had one! He was a “community organizer” in the exact same communities where there are now five murders a week – there were fifty-four shootings over the 4th of July weekend alone. How did that work out for him? Oh, that’s right – guns are to blame! Trump’s only chance is if the folks honestly reflect on the disaster of the last eight years. I am cautiously confident that they will.

  16. Marlee says

    August 13, 2016 at 6:40 am

    HOW can this crazy person be a candidate for U.S President??
    What does this say about us?

  17. Pogo says

    August 13, 2016 at 7:39 am

    The pernicious Drumpf constantly inspires recollection of this question: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t6qQSll7InQ

    But not more than reading the comments of his inane, servile supporters. Or the latest from Floriduh’s endless nightmare, a.k.a Republicans.

  18. woodchuck says

    August 13, 2016 at 7:43 am

    Trump,lesser of two evil”s

  19. PCer says

    August 13, 2016 at 7:59 am

    Thank you Pierre. I appreciate that you give a new perspective to our very red county. it is scary how many angry white folks want to live in their bubble and not see the real world and real truths around them.

  20. Sherry says

    August 13, 2016 at 8:13 am

    Wonderful article Pierre. . . the clever phrases and analogies would be quite humorous if he did not receive such passionate support. A great line, from my husband, that fits this article perfectly:

    “Trump has lifted the lid on the cesspool of America”. . . Oh the STENCH!

  21. Bc. says

    August 13, 2016 at 8:52 am

    How can anyone vote for Hillary a liar a thief sells her office for personal gain etc. etc. at least we know where Trump is coming from. This woman will destroy the America that we all know now. She should have been charged for leaking classified e mails. That goes to show us how corrupt the system is from the top down and people want to put her in the oval office to destroy this country a chronic lier who believes her own lies a womanizer for a husband and they talk about trump hating woman bill could not even wipe trumps ass when it comes to respecting woman people wake up Donald Duck would be better than her as potus. Unless you all want a crimanial liar sell out and a incompetent person who leaves our ambassador and his protection guys hung out to die than lies about a movie. Not the real reason that her e mails were hacked and the terrorist new we’re and when the ambassador would be wake up don’t let this woman any were near the White House

  22. L.D.Ablo says

    August 13, 2016 at 9:18 am

    Trump is doing what the right wing nut jobs have been doing for years: talk tough and trot out Jesus and the bible.

  23. RobJr says

    August 13, 2016 at 10:05 am

    Pierre,
    You risk being severely excoriated by some of the approximately 10,000 Republicans here in Flagler County who voted for Trump in the March primary. I expect the responses to be more vociferous than those in response to your columns regarding social injustices

    There has not been much that Mitt Romney has said that I agree with. However, he hit the nail square on the head with his remarks about Trump. “Here’s what I know. Donald Trump is a phony, a fraud. His promises are as worthless as a degree from Trump University.” When I saw the video of his remarks I had a very hard laugh.

    You reference his apologists, the Chamber of Commerce poll, you overlooked the other 10,000. Birds of a feather do tend to flock together.

    I saw a Photoshop of Trump wearing a Ku Klux Klan type hat/hood stamped with the words Make America Great Again. Take Back America was their 2008 phrase.
    Most of us know what those, not so coded, code words and phrases really mean.
    Saying that Trump is a: bigot, sexist, racist, liar, and provocateur of hate would be redundant, so I won’t say it.

    A renowned poet, novelist, educator said “When someone shows you who they are believe them; the first time.”

  24. Ron R. says

    August 13, 2016 at 10:16 am

    Great read, Pierre. I really can’t understand why (some) seemingly intelligent people think that Trump would be good for this country. I can understand the uneducated and uninformed supporting him, but not those with a modicum of intelligence and sense.

  25. Born and Raised Here says

    August 13, 2016 at 10:57 am

    As a small media service I find it unprofessional for Flagler Live to give an opinion or comment on these matters. I feel that your primary purpose is to report the news and happenings of our county. I don’t know or care what your political opinions are, but as my local news source I do expect you to be more directed towards my County. So do what you are suppose to do, and serve and report the news of Flagler County.

  26. Common Sense says

    August 13, 2016 at 11:32 am

    I want to ask all these Republicans who call Mrs. Clinton names and think she should be in jail, exactly what they are accusing her of doing.
    Eight Congressional investigations have cleared her of any wrong doing on Benghazi.
    She has released her tax returns and there is no smoking gun there.
    As for her ties to the Clinton foundation, what laws has she broken?
    The Republicans have spun so many lies about her that they sound like broken records but the facts don’t support their rhetoric.
    If Trump didn’t have Mrs. Clinton to criticise, he would have nothing to talk about.

  27. Yellowstone says

    August 13, 2016 at 11:33 am

    Caption for that photo should be:

    “Hey, I am only doing this shtick for me . . . this last year is just more sarcasm! Are all you folks too dense to figure that out?”

  28. Makeitso1701 says

    August 13, 2016 at 11:36 am

    Looking forward to the day after the elections and read the newspapers headlines….” Hillary wins in a landslide”

  29. Donald Trump's Tiny Fingers says

    August 13, 2016 at 11:37 am

    Area man angry that opinion piece contains opinions, news at 11.

  30. Bc. says

    August 13, 2016 at 11:37 am

    Pierre what happened to fair and balanced reporting you are so one sided I don’t no how you can have a readership being so one sided spewing your liberal crap all the time it’s the same crap article after article I guess that’s why you write for a small loacal news paper nobody else would higher You I don’t see a Pulitzer coming your way in your life time any time soon try and report fair booth sides of the story not your own liberal one sided beliefs

  31. Geezer says

    August 13, 2016 at 12:32 pm

    Yeah Pierre,

    You need to be impartial and just stick to the news,
    just like Fox and Newsmax.

    Listen to Born and Raised Here.

    I’m having trouble typing–my laughing fit has thrown off
    my fine motor skills.

  32. Sherry says

    August 13, 2016 at 1:05 pm

    What??? Have some of the readers here never heard of an “Editorial”? The owner and editor of this news site certainly has every right to write one! Those who have a problem with this can always return to being manipulated by FOX or NewsMax or some other false, conspiracy laden news outlet.

    Oh, and BTW. . . Flagler County belongs to ALL of us who live here!

  33. Just a thought says

    August 13, 2016 at 1:46 pm

    To all those that think Pierre Tristam, who is FlaglerLive, should only voice his opinion if it is the same as yours really need to relax a bit. Pierre and many of his readers are liberal and as he owns the joint, he has a perogative to write whatever he wants. If you don’t like it, turn on Fox News.

  34. What happened to common sense says

    August 13, 2016 at 2:07 pm

    I have never read one critical comment on Hillary here. Why is that? I see that the MSM bigotry reaches all the way down to this rag . I know most already know this, but just in case a few don’t, reporters used to take the rules of objective journalism seriously. Their used to be some integrity. No more.
    This is the first time I have actually seen the press try to dictate the outcome of an election, and I deplore them for it.

  35. Steve says

    August 13, 2016 at 2:09 pm

    Trump knows exactly what he is doing. No one else does. That why he was so successful in business. He will be equally successful running this country. Tristan, you are so bias, you have no idea. You call him the suicide candidate but Hillary is the only one that will commit suicide because she wants , needs the presidency so bad, but she is not going to get it.go Trump.

  36. Sherry says

    August 13, 2016 at 2:09 pm

    Here’s my take on the whole stupid Trump show. . . It’s all about his huge narcissistic ego! He doesn’t really want to do all the “real work” required to be even a dangerously lousy President. Trump just wants to be in front of any TV camera, any time, any way! His ego requires that his obsession with using a TV camera as a mirror be fed 24/7! With all the ignorant racist drooling over his every appearance. . . he now has a second “beast” that must be fed.

    For Trump. . . his incessant, ever increasingly outrageous, imbecilic statements accomplish several burning, sociopathic desires:

    1. They get him on TV EVERY DAY!
    2. They gin up demented praise from his racist followers
    3. They fed his huge ego because he is able to completely manipulate and make fools of so many people
    4. They give him the opportunity to say ridiculously despicable things about those who are superior to him. . . as he is the ultimate insecure, paranoid school yard bully

  37. What happened to common sense says

    August 13, 2016 at 2:22 pm

    Let me see, uneducated and uninformed people support Trump, eh. Why, the elitist asks? I am just a stupid guy, but how about Islamic extremists, politicized justice department, failing education, deteriorated national defense, open borders, decrepit inner cities, deteriorated VA, corrupt foundations, to name a few.

  38. Ivahadit says

    August 13, 2016 at 2:50 pm

    Thank you, Common Sense. The pro-Trump comments are nothing short of idiotic.

  39. PCer says

    August 13, 2016 at 3:34 pm

    For those of you criticizing the editor, do you do the same for Fox News? Do you call O’Reilly or Hannity and tell them to only report the facts? Or do you take their opinion as fact? You have been conned! Educate yourselves and open your eyes. Read everything. Analyze everything for yourself. Stop letting others do it for you. A vote for Trump is a vote for the dumbing down of America.

  40. no says

    August 13, 2016 at 5:04 pm

    Nobody seems to understand the Freedom of speech, keep up the great work and journalism

  41. Donald Trump's Tiny Fingers says

    August 13, 2016 at 5:09 pm

    Nah, I think people that are into trump fall into one of three categories: a) people that see “telling it like it is” as a justification for being openly racist, bigoted, misogynist, or whatever is generally accepted as asshole behavior; b) people that spend too much time in their social circle of white RRR teabagging preppers, soaking up propaganda from glen beck or whoever and not enough time getting actual socialization with real people; and c) accelerationists that want to see the entire establishment burn and are voting trump because he’s an incompetent cheeto-colored moron that will wreck it because he’s so unfit to govern.

    I dabbled with the idea of being c) because the entire system is broken from the top down and wrecking it and then letting the ensuing riots and chaos clean up the rest seemed like the best option for a society that, between wall street and police, simply does not act in its best interests. Hillary stands for far too many things that I find reprehensible and at the end of the day, I have to live with myself. I’ve seen mentioned on this very site that a third party vote is a vote for trump, and I disagree. I’m voting third party (no not libertarian or green, those guys are nutbags).

  42. Marlee says

    August 13, 2016 at 5:10 pm

    Remember…there is a Constitution, and 3 Branches of Gov’t…
    Legislative –Executive – Judicial
    and…you think Trump will fix those??????
    Really?

  43. Cyd Weeks says

    August 13, 2016 at 5:47 pm

    Wait what happened to common sense, you forgot the words…white, beer drinkin’ hicks. :) I totally completely agree with you about the media. And all this email stuff, the foundation,etc reminds me so of Watergate, just a different party. Interesting times. Guess we’ll see how it all works out.

  44. Oldseadog says

    August 13, 2016 at 5:49 pm

    In a dilemma!

    With the choice we the people have coming up,
    we are truly between the devil and the deep blue sea
    (IE a rock and a hard place for non-nautical readers)

    Only God can save our souls!

  45. Drumpf says

    August 13, 2016 at 5:59 pm

    Born and Raised Here – You are showing everybody that you obviously were born and raised by the fact that you are not familiar with this thing called an “editorial”. I hope that FPCHS is doing a better job now than they did back in your day.

    Great article. Go Hillary!

  46. Fredrick says

    August 13, 2016 at 6:10 pm

    Unless both parties can have a “do-over”, then I will go with someone who speaks his mind. At least we know what we get. Better than going with one of the biggest liars and crooks the world has ever know with Clinton.

    Much of your words in your article are just plane foolish and liberal BS. I know that you Pierre are not so stupid that you took his 2nd Amendment comment as an assassination threat against Clinton. Other liberals perhaps but you know better. The words he chose were stupid but the true meaning was correct. People who believe and support the constitution need to unite to protect it. Who those that think my words are a threat, to be clear, unite with their votes. Just has is comments about banning people until proper vetting can be done. You know what he meant but those who have a public way to post their political lean such as you and the mass media will do so.

    I still think we vote for a “do-over” and find to better people. Can it really be that hard?

  47. Andy P says

    August 13, 2016 at 6:41 pm

    To all those trashing Mr Tristam’s editorials/POV/commentary…uh, you DO know who’s newspaper/site this is, right? And you DO understand the principles of an Editorial, right? I lean left and I’ve seen this site slam both sides when they make a BS move; so I’m not too worried about impartiality. FlaglerLive calls it like they see it… Either way, keep those page views coming- FlaglerLive appreciates the clicks – even the haters :)

  48. NortonSmitty says

    August 13, 2016 at 9:07 pm

    All I got to say is there are a lot of stupid bastards that are going to be really embarrassed looking back at this time in their lives.

  49. JonP says

    August 13, 2016 at 9:55 pm

    Just keep drinking that liberal kool aid. Shouldn’t you be reporting the news and not boring us with your personal BS

  50. Scared Independent says

    August 14, 2016 at 11:55 pm

    What it came down to for me is simple… Trump scares me, but Hillary scares me more as she is far too liberal in her policy for me. I refuse to not vote and in my opinion there are no other quality candidates (not that Trump is quality…) available to vote for (and please don’t mention that libertarian nut). 2016 should’ve been better and I am still stunned that this country couldn’t come up with any better choices. We’re in for a nerve-wracking next 3 months and an even scarier next 4 years no matter who you’re voting for.

  51. MR G says

    August 18, 2016 at 8:29 am

    KEEP DRINKING THE KOOL AID SHEEPLE….
    VOTE TRUMP !!!!!!!

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